Why I'm here....

Since I've always been quick with an opinion an old friend once lost and again found suggested that perhaps I should share with more people my commentary. Never being one to pass on a challenge I thought I'd give it a whirl.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

"I Will Always Love You."

Dolly Parton will forever more be my favorite all time artist. The very first album I ever owned was a Dolly Parton Album with this picture on the cover. I wanted that thirty-three album more than I can ever remember wanting anything. I actually sold candy for our school door to door in our neighborhood to get it to. It had wonderful songs such as "Love is Like A Butterfly", "Coat of Many Colors", and "I Will Always Love You". I think I wore that album out and it is the only Album I have kept all these years. Albums aren't very practical these days, but it was something that at eight years of age I worked my tail off to get. Dolly is so full of the life that we all so desperately want to have. She's entertainment at it's best and I only wish I had seen her in concert at an age where I could remember it clearly. Her song, "I Will Always Love You" has been done by many people in many different ways so it is of no surprise that it is being released yet again. This time though the artist herself is lending her vocals to back up a fellow artist named Stephanie J. Block. Although I will never like any version as good as Dolly's original here is a link for you to listen to the latest one.


I also found the below site where you can hear a few of the others. The one that is tagged is the one I found to be the most interesting.


Please feel free to share your thoughts.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Mistakes, I've Made A Few!

I believe this is one of the busiest weekends I have had in a long long time. Yesterday I started off with a trip to "Ryan's" restaurant in Auburn with my parents and my niece and nephew. Then a little light shopping, of course home to get my walk in. I couldn't possibly not have walked as gorgeous as it was yesterday. Then I had an evening at the Allen County Fair planned with my brother and my niece and nephew. We bought them wrist bands and so they got to go nuts. They kept riding rides and doing the slides over and over again. They also enjoyed Elephant ears and the Horse show along with looking at the various other animals that were there. Four hours later and oh my aching legs and even though the kids could have stayed all night it was time for them to go home and get baths. Then after that I got the opportunity to spend some time with some of my graduating class. It was nice to just sit and relax and listen to others talk of times gone by and of their life as it is today. I think I actually have caught a few of them off guard with the way I am now. You see in high school I was quiet. I didn't say a lot and I wasn't as opinionated as I am now. I also wasn't an open book. I am definitely an open book now. Sometimes so much so that it startles people. One of the things we discussed last night was mistakes that have been made. Lord knows I've made more than my fair share of mistakes. Mistakes make us who we are today though. We learn from them and hopefully move on and as one of my classmates said last night we hopefully never repeat them. During the night it was obvious we all have made mistakes and have made choices that have brought us great joy and even success in some cases. I worry about one classmate though for the choice they are about to make could be a big one. Yet the thing that is so miraculous about mistakes is that they are all our own to make and rarely would we allow someone to talk us out of them. I would also have you know that the person who says they have never made a mistake is either not human or is lying. I simply listened last night. I said little about this persons decision. The thought that went through my mind was that the grass is always greener on the other side. Yet I am not hearing the whole situation I am sure and as I said a person's life is their own to live. I came home around 1:30 in the morning completely exhausted and so wrapped up a very busy Saturday. Sunday was a little less busy. Lunch at Pizza Hut with family and then of course home for my walk and then to a cook out with my friend Vinnie. I wasn't great company tonight. I had a raging headache. I felt awful for having been poor company, but the food was good and listening to the families and friends chatter was warm and welcoming at least. I wrapped up my evening by vacuuming, dusting, doing laundry and writing out bills. It was a good weekend, but a very busy one. One where I really had a lot I needed to get done that I didn't... Perhaps it's another mistake, but I somehow doubt it. One mistake I never want to make is not having time for family and friends. In a blink of an eye family and friends can be gone. The work will always be there tomorrow. So
yes, mistake I have made a few, but then again, who hasn't?

Saturday, July 25, 2009

One Man's Trash...

Surely you've heard the old saying, "One man's trash is another man's treasure". If you want to see if you can prove this theory just spend a Saturday morning going from garage sale to garage sale. You'll find a wide variety of stuff that people have decided they can now live without and they no longer treasure. You may even find a treasure or two that you just can't leave without buying. You can also find some of the oddest items while perusing these sales as well. I love going garage selling; however, I do not enjoy buying anymore. As I have gotten older I have gotten more and more to where I would rather live life like I'm living in a hotel. I mean I want only the items I absolutely need to survive and maybe a few extra items. Having had a couple of garage sales this year myself and having talked with friends that have had them it seems that garage sales are not doing well this year at all. As I was discussing with friends this is odd seeing as how in this economy you would think people would be going to garage sales to find bargains on items they may need. I find this especially true if you have children. They go through so many clothes so I would think parents would want to get them as inexpensively as possible. As for having a garage sale it sometimes surprises me that so many people have them. If done correctly they take a lot of time and effort. There is hardly ever any way you will make the kind of money it would take to pay for time spent watching the sale, setting it up and then tearing it down. I recently had a neighbor who had a garage sale. I wouldn't exactly classify them as the brightest bulbs in the box. They set it up on a Thursday night with the weather forecast being rain and thunder storms. They didn't even bother to tarp the items of stuff they had laid out. It rained all night long on their items. They left the stuff out in the yard for a week before cleaning it up and even though today they had the items cleaned up, their signs are still up and have not been taken down stating that they are indeed having a sale. Either way the economy is killing the garage sale fever that use to flash through state of Indiana at one time. I suppose people today are no longer interested in one mans trash or his treasure. If you're going to have a garage sale though it's best you check that forecast and hopefully you'll find sunny skies. Have you gone garage selling lately? Find any treasures? See any odd items? See anything that looks like it should have been featured on "The Liars Club"?

Friday, July 24, 2009

Fort Wayne-Allen County Fair Through July 26th.

Just a reminder in case you didn't have your fill of festival last week that the Fort Wayne/Allen County Fair is going on out at the fair grounds through Sunday. Go out and enjoy the food and fun if you get the chance.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Houston We Have Bees.. Yet Again.

My house seems to be the place that bee's live for. Last year it was yellow jackets. This year I have carpenter bees. It appears that these bees love unpainted or unfinished wood and that they love to drill tiny holes and burrow in so that they can lay their eggs in tiny caverns and then seal the eggs in with food so that the bees can mature in their sealed cocoon in the wall. Unlike other bees there is no queen bee and no male bees around. The single female bee will tend to her colony of baby bees until they are grown all on her own. These bees appear to be relatively quiet during the day. I hear some stirings in my ceiling in my bathroom, but not much. At night though it's like a loud purring of multiple cats up there. I'm not really sure what that is all about. From everything I have read these bees are relatively harmless; however, I don't see how I can let them live in my bathroom ceiling. I know there is going to be a down side to it somewhere and I really don't relish the idea of finding out what it is at a most inopportune moment. On the other hand I despise the thought of killing any living thing. I usually catch bees or spiders or what have you and put them outside. I even went so far one time as to take a mouse I had caught to the park in a Tupperware container and set it free. I have a live and let live policy in life. I don't step on ants, I don't kill flies. I am guilty of killing fleas and mosquito's, but i would rather not. So I don't relish the idea of killing these poor bees and I have no idea on how to go about doing it either. Either way. I knew when I heard that purring sound a month ago that something was up. Bees be back once again.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

It's Not About Size.

Several of the magazines today that I saw in the store listed articles about Michael Jackson's extreme malnutrition and his extreme thin and frail body. These articles speculate on the fact that Michael may have been anorexic and that this may have attributed to his demise. I have no doubts in my mind that Michael was a severely tormented soul. I also understand that one thing people do in their lives when they are struggling is use food. They may over eat. They may under eat, or in extreme cases binge and purge. This is also something I know a great deal about. People who over eat do it most often due to a filling of a void that needs filled. Whether this void is of self worth, or self loathing is a hard question to answer. Food in this case is used as a comfort. You see the food won't judge you and rarely will it let you down, but it's only a temporary comfort and usually leaves a person feeling worse than they did prior to eating it. Purge and binge? I can understand where people might do this too. I mean you want the food for comfort, but then you feel guilty for eating it. You feel guilty for losing that control you have for a moment. Then the need to get rid of it may become overwhelming. Lastly there is the lack of eating of food. One might wonder a lot on this one how this is a comfort. I know all too well. In my teen years and into my early twenties I was very depressed on many levels. I was also unsure and confused. There were very few things that I felt I had control of, but food was one thing I could control. I could say when and what I ate. My friend Joe drew a characterization of me one time where he depicted me with either just a diet coke or a water. I have often looked at that, yes I still have it, and wondered if he knew how accurate it was for that time. I was fairly thin back in those days. It wasn't easy. It was done from lack of food. It wasn't the healthy thing to do. The diet and program I am on now is slow and frustrating; however, it is the correct and healthy way this time. Back then a normal time for me would be a sandwich every couple of days or a salad. I rarely ate on an everyday basis. Diet Coke and water were my staples. I remember one week I went all seven days and food never touched my lips. I also remember a few weeks later getting very sick and being so week I remember crawling to the bathroom. I had the flu, but I think it was twice as bad as it would have been since my body didn't have the nutrients it needed to support and sustain me. It took me a long time to figure it out in my mind and I did talk to a counselor. Dr. B. He was really cool, but even then there were things I didn't tell him. I prayed and I did a lot of thinking and thankfully I pulled through that dark time. It was followed by years of using food as a comfort though. Now I am working on being mentally and physically fit. The mental is good I think. I am happy. I have a direction in my life and a purpose. I'm taking weight off very slow and very steady and by eating (that is a key) and exercising. Either way I can understand the emotional roller coasters and their associations they can have with food. Yes, I think Michael was a tortured soul and I can sort of relate. I pulled out of mine though. I doubt very much though that his lack of eating or food had anything to do with size though. Food issues rarely truly have to do with size. There are underlying issues the person is dealing with. No, I know from my own demons and my own issues, it's not about size.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

My Blogging 1 Year Anniversary

It's hard to believe it's been a year. Seems to me though I find myself saying that a lot these days. It's hard to believe so many things. I find myself these past few weeks in a mood to reflect, but not so much in writing. There are some feelings that you just can't convey into writing no matter how hard you try. Yesterday as I was walking I found myself thrown back in time thinking to a time when I had walked home from work late at night over more than ten miles of road. My uncle Roger has made me promise never again to do that and to call him no matter what time of day or night. That was in the later half of the 90's. It saddened me that as I walked and remembered that he's no longer with us today. This picture of what we always called "cat tails" I took the picture of on my walk on Monday. They also took me back to days of my youth. We lived along a railroad track and we were always playing with these things. They were our toys of our own choosing you might say. So many memories that seem like I could just reach back to yesterday and pull into this very moment. Funny how in one way they seem so long ago and in another they feel as if they just happened. Time is a precious gift that goes way too quickly. It just keeps reminding me that I should enjoy my time and not work it away. My neighbor that lost his wife last year has been giving me a lot of items from his home. He's in his late eighties. He talks about how he feels his life winding down. I know as he gives me these items that he's preparing to leave life behind him. It's sad to think of. I take the items and always smile, but a little piece of my heart breaks each time as I think of how lonely he must feel. He has no one left here. He's all alone except for his cat and dog and his neighbors. Life is precious and this year has gone by so quickly. It's been a good year. Hopefully we'll be counting many more in the future.

Monday, July 13, 2009

No Giant Midway at Three Rivers...

All I can say is WOW. On Saturday as I passed the Coliseum to go meet my parents out off state street for lunch I noticed an ere sight for this time of year. The parking lot was empty. Every year for as long as I can remember I have made one trip during Three Rivers Festival to the "Giant Midway" for rides for my niece and nephew, or back in the day myself, and an elephant ear. I liked going there a lot better than going down town. I have wandered downtown for Three Rivers periodically but not often. This year though there will be no trip to the Coliseum for Three Rivers. Without giving a reason the people who do it pulled out at last minute literally. They were scheduled until Tuesday of last week to be there on Wednesday for their usual set up. I'm thinking it's the economy and the fact that I don't really think Three Rivers got that much attention last year. If memory serves wasn't there some type of shooting too? Either way I think it's sad to see this tradition gone on some level. On other levels it's not life shattering and there are other things to do, but for me it was just another of life changes that seem or appear to be coming in droves these days.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Foolish Pride Be Damned!

Some of my fondest memories have nothing to do with human pride. As I was walking the other day (Joe, no eye rolls please) I happened to hear a conversation one of the disc jockey's was having regarding how people have gotten to where they have no pride and have no shame in accepting a hand out. He went on to talk about how people were going out of their way to get their children on the free lunch program and to get a government check. He took his time reminiscing about days gone by when people were not proud of needing government assistance and seem to feel it's a good thing. I don't personally think it's a good thing to want to sponge off the government and I know that this man has probably known his share of people who don't need assistance yet they are taking advantage of the system and they are even lying to do it. I know I personally have witnessed people using food stamp cards and then getting into BMW's. I also worked with a woman who was making more money than me and she was getting a HUD house. So I can see how some people can become cynical. I also do believe that we are raising a generation that doesn't want to work. Yet I am not as cynical as that radio DJ and I believe that people who have worked hard and tried and are having hard times due to hardships that were unforeseen or out of their control should not have to hang their heads in shame. I personally don't feel there is any shame in asking for help if you need it. Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone was willing to lend everyone else a helping hand? Either way I recall many times growing up when my family had to take advantage of government aide. It had nothing to do with my dad not being proud or not wanting to support his family. He would get laid off or lose his job for whatever reason and we would have to go on food stamps and get government cheese. It never lasted long because my dad was a go getter, still is, and he would go out and get work at whatever he needed to do to get us through. My dad has always been very good at managing money and my mother was always at home for us whenever we needed her because of it. My brother and I had a wonderful family to grow up in. So with mom making our house a home for my dad, brother and I all the financial worries fell on my dad. Out of this came wonderful memories though. How one might ask? Simply by our not being geared towards things and more towards time spent together, some of it routine. One routine we had was going to the Salvation Army almost every Saturday. I loved that store. We didn't always go in search of anything in particular, just to look around and shop. For my brother and I that meant a toy or a book or some treasure of our own that we might find. Yes we grew up on mostly second hand clothing. It didn't kill either one of us. Every fall we would get a few new clothes from Sears for school, but other than that it was second hand clothes either from the Salvation Army or from my grandmother Lula going to a similar version down south called the Exchange. So I understand how some can get upset with all the people walking around with their hands reached out; yet if they are reaching out of necessity not facilitated by their own laziness I see no shame in it. So to that I would say foolish pride be damned. I would also hope that each and everyone of you could know half the joy of living life not geared towards thing, but rather to living life and knowing the joys of loving time spent with family just sitting and talking. For now I have that luxury too. I get to sit usually at least once a week in my parents living room or in the back yard with them and remember times gone by. Life is precious and short. A lesson many learned only momentarily this week as they said goodbye to Michael Jackson. So foolish pride be damned.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

What A Crock!

As I posted on face book today a statement about "Wondering how one goes about losing a crock pot." I was met with two comments that added to my amusement. One asked me why I would want to and the other asked me if it just disappeared from where it usually is. Hum good questions. I didn't want to lose a crock pot, I was in the process of trying to find mine for the carry in at work. I never gave it a thought that it might not be where it normally is. It normally sits on the top of the hutch in the kitchen. The hutch is taller than me so yes I would have to look up to see it, but it's been where I have kept it for years and it has never once failed to be there until today. One would say I was floored and stunned when I reached up to get it and it just wasn't sitting there. I looked through all the kitchen cabinets, in the stove, in the over flow cabinet and not one sign of it anywhere. When was the last time I remember using it you might ask? Well, I made chili and took it to a friends house. I'm quiet certain I left with it and from there is a mystery. So I ran to WalMart's and bought the crock pot you see in the picture and rushed it home to wash it and clean it for use. Then grabbed the hot dogs for the carry in that will go in it and ran out the door to head to work. If that crock pot is sitting in it's usual place when I go home tonight I guess we'll just have to sit down and have a talk. Of course I'll be in the mental hospital, but none the less I'm sure it will show up eventually. Sigh, what a crock.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Not An Ordinary Chocolate.

News flash! I am not a big chocolate fan contrary to opinion that if you are female you must love chocolate. As a matter of fact I rarely eat the stuff and often left to my house you will find it long past the point of throwing out. I do all the time. Throw it out that is. I find it's turned white. There is one chocolate sin I have though. I love "PLAIN" M&M candies. Notice the plain. Sometimes I'll stray from my norm and get the peanut butter ones or the nuts, but only on rare occasions. So now they are attempting "Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M's". So I tried them. They are not bad, but if I were Mars candy I wouldn't be putting all my eggs in that basket. I have heard, but not seen yet, that there are coconut M&M's and you can bet once I find them I will definitely try them. So if you ever want to get on my good side you might throw me an occasional Hershey's Kiss, but to really sweeten the pot give me the not so ordinary, yet called plain, M&M's candies. It's sure to do the trick!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

"In Touch Weekly" Magazine Gets it Right!

Let me first state I mean no disrespect to Michael Jackson by stating this, but "In Touch Weekly" appears to me to be the only magazine out there that got their weekly release correct. Of course this is only my opinion. After all both Michael and Farrah were huge in their own rights. They both died on the same day and after Michael died that day it's almost as if the press and people in general forgot that Farrah had lost her brave fight with cancer that same day. Then it seems that President Obama decided he'd send his respects to the Jackson family, I wonder if he did the same for Farrah's family. Why is it they take some stars and make such a big hoopla? I mean I am sorry the man is dead. I loved his "Thriller" album. I also hold him no ill will for his charges he's had against him. He was found innocent, who knows if he was or not. I think his life seemed extremely sad to me. With all his fame and money he didn't appear from outwards to be happy. Farrah on the other hand appeared to be happy except for not well. Then lets look at how they died. Farrah died fighting to live. Wanting to beat the beast of burden that ravaged her body. Michael's death is shrouded in mystery. Heart Attack either by lack of food or by medications. Who knows. Either way both deaths were a shock in their own right. Perhaps people saw it coming more with Farrah, especially after her recent self documentary. It bothered me though that once Michael died Farrah faded into the back ground. I never really cared that much for her as an actress. I did like her in "Small Sacrifices." Never liked her in Charlie's Angels. Liked the other two, but not her. She played a ditsy blond. Yeah that was a hard role. While looking at the multitude of magazines today though I noticed three stood out. "Star" for it's almost none-story on either of the celebrities dying. "People" for it's grandiose cover, which I think would have thrilled Michael and "In Touch Weekly" for giving equal billing on it's cover to both celebrities. Which one will probably sell the most copies? I'm betting "People"; however, if I were going to buy one I would want the one that commemorated the two of them and their special day that now binds them together. Yep, "In Touch Weekly" got it right if you ask me.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Mold is in No Way my Friend

So last week during my week off on my very first day of vacation I started taking a sinus infection. I got the fever and really sore and tender to the touch face with all the gross other things we'll just not mention at this time. I kept a headache pretty much the entire week. I still had a lot of fun on my vacation though with all the birthday festivities and such, but it took the wind out of my sail one might say. It left me a little on the lazy and not feeling up to going the extra mile side. I slept a lot more than I would have. I didn't get my spring cleaning done, although towards the end I got a good start on it. So today I was still not feeling the greatest and my breathing was really really off. It wasn't a good thing at all. I was sitting talking with my mom, I keep telling you all she's great, and she noticed my breathing and coughing and wheezing and being a mom she asked me if my allergies were acting up due to the high mold count. High mold? Sure enough upon checking the mold counts are extremely high today for this time of year. I checked the yard and mold is growing on the trees. I haven't really noticed this except in the spring or the fall before but my mother assures me it's normal during "Dog Days"? Anyway, I am highly allergic to the mold on trees and other types up to and including Penicillin. So I don't always take my Nasacort AQ, I usually save it to take only when absolutely have to. It's a steroid and unless I have to I don't use it. After speaking with mom I went home and used it though and just like that my breathing has improved a lot. Still not perfect but oh so much better. I always take Zyrtec daily. Nasacort with insurance though runs me $52 a bottle so I don't take it everyday. I find I really don't have to and my sinus don't dry out as badly if I don't anyway. When I need it though it's nice to know I have it around. So if you're like me and allergic to mold you might want to get that medication running through your body. Mold is in no way my friend.

Where A Kid Can Be A Kid

On Monday, my brother and I took my niece and nephew to Coventry movie cinemas to see "Monsters VS. Aliens". The children loved the movie and I'm afraid my brother has had to add that movie to the list of must buys to have at his house. After the movie the children needed to get out and run some after sitting a couple of hours so my brother and I took them over to Indian Trail Park. I had never been there before. I tell you it's the kind of place we only dreamed of when I was growing up and as I told my brother, "If you're a kid and can't find something to do here, then something is wrong with you." This park is located off Aboite Center Road. I took several pictures and I just thought I would share them with you. There also appear to be several bike or walking paths in this area. If you have children this is a must to check out. Enjoy the pictures.