Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Who would have thought I'd live to see 2013. So many I knew in the past year didn't. 2012 was a year for loss and yet a year for growth. Of all things I know though one thing is for certain as I go into this new year I have never been more sure of who I am and how I want to live my life. I have never had a clearer view of what my purpose is and what my values are. There are parts of my life that I place on a shelf as if to allow people to check it out and read it's layers and yes there are parts I keep under lock and key only allowing some to view. I believe that is the same of all people and I'm not sure any one person ever truly really knows someone. I like to think that no one can ever stun or shock me at this point, that I've seen it all, but inevitably someone shocks me, stuns me or lets me down so badly that I am not sure how to move past it. I do though because I have come to understand that people are human and they make mistakes. They make bad decisions and they say things that may be hurtful without any knowledge that they are doing so. A few examples from my past year would be a person I admired a lot and wanted for a friend left me feeling cold and used. I somehow doubt that person had any idea they were doing it but in the end I couldn't handle it. Perhaps I should have been able to read it and move past it but the timing and my hormones were off. Another left me sad with a comment on the size of someones ass. Personally I don't know why that persons ass has grown to three times it's once time size but having dealt with my own health issues and weight issues this year it was hurtful but wasn't meant to be I know. Then there are people who get off on drama. I hate drama of any kind, but there are some out there that are drawn to it, live it and I believe need it to survive. I try to avoid those people because life comes with enough of it's own curve balls without people helping it along. It's going to prove I believe to be a very interesting year. I'm hopeful to have my health and waistline and mental all back in good shape. I'm hoping to move forward in growth of spirit and soul. I have a wonderful set of friends and family and I know that with every set back I have I will find the strength to move past it. I was sitting and thinking earlier about a group of friends and a conversation we had years ago. In that conversation we all told what our worst fears were. I said mine was growing old alone. Well I may not have a husband or a 24/7 partner and I may or may not have that in the future but I am not alone. I have my family. I have my friends and I foremost have my faith that God never leaves my side. So as people do things that make you angry or hurt your feelings I ask that you think about it before you let it get to you. Ask yourself if they really meant to be mean or hurtful or if they just unwittingly did something without thinking. I've found most often they are doing it without knowing and if that is the case one should be able to find it in their heart to move past it. Sure maybe you should talk to them about it if it bothers you a lot; however, most things are not worth the lost time, fights, hurt or pain. So lets not look for the games that people play but as the old adage goes look for the bright side. Well that is enough of me for now. God Bless you all and welcome to 2013. The Mayans were definitely wrong for most of us.
Posted by Sheila