Why I'm here....

Since I've always been quick with an opinion an old friend once lost and again found suggested that perhaps I should share with more people my commentary. Never being one to pass on a challenge I thought I'd give it a whirl.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Sometimes I Forget

I’ve studied a lot of different things in school. I guess I just feel like no matter how much I study I never really learn enough though and sometimes I forget what it is that I have learned along the way. When I was younger I had a lot of insecurities so human relationships and psychology got a lot of my time in college. I should be better at relationships with all the training I have had, but the one thing I realize is that I am definitely a person ruled by my passion and emotions. I often don’t take the time to stop and rationalize through what I am about to do. That can get a person into a heap of trouble as my grandmother use to say. I would definitely say I am much better at reading people. I have a vast array of friends from all scopes of life. I like it that way. Some of them are open and straight forward; others hide behind a protective shield never allowing anyone close to their hearts. I find people fascinating to watch. I could sit for hours in a public place and just try to figure out what is going on in the lives of perfect strangers. I also have a habit of asking very personal questions if I get comfortable enough. My blunt nature is usually met one of two ways 1) with fascination and need to know more or 2) with disdain and disgust that one could be so bold. I love when someone does the first. There is a third rarity and that is a person who just accepts me. The most accepting person I have ever known in my life was my uncle Roger. I miss him so much sometimes. He didn’t judge me or expect me to be anything other than what I was. As I was driving into work today I took a moment to think about some blunders I have made recently and the best way to go about correcting them. Thankfully I don’t think I’ve done anything that bad, just forgotten that to men silence is golden and to women communications is a need. I think there must be some cosmic joke in the universe to have made men and women’s needs in human relationships so differently that one has to stop and think out their interactions so intensely. I suppose it doesn’t help being that I am a sponge for other people’s emotions. I can usually tell you what someone is feeling and almost before they can. I have always been that way, so I tend to stay away from people when they are feeling extremely negative because I just can’t afford to take on those emotions myself. I suppose it makes for an interesting world. One might get bored if we all thought and felt the same things. I was reading an article on how women and men view text messages differently. A woman sends out a message and expects a response almost immediately while a man sends one out and if he gets a response great, if not he’ll worry about it later. Is that true? Any of you guys out there want to comment on whether it bothers you as much as it does me to have to sit and wait for a response that either doesn’t come, comes hours later or instead of being answered the person sends you a text message with a new question not even related to what you asked? Also does it sadden anyone out there besides me that the art of actually writing letters is slowly dying? There is nothing more precious or valuable than a hand written letter full of passion and longing. I just somehow don’t think you can put that in an email or a text and do it justice. Good Lord, then there is dating. How differently do women and men usually view dating? I mean I think I fall outside the norm on this one because I don’t think you have to be with the person you are dating 24/7 like a lot of women I know and I think each person has to maintain a feeling of self and their own life as well as join with their partner, but what is it that makes men think nothing should change in their lives and women think that men should now make them the center of their universe? Is it like that in gay relationships? I mean there are normally one feminine roll and one masculine role so I was just wondering if they go through the same issues. So many questions and so little time and yet they will never truly be answered. The best advise I can give anyone in any type of relationship is to not over think it. Have you ever noticed that if you sit and dwell on something it becomes this huge monster of an issue when in reality it started out being nothing? This is what I have to remind myself over and over, but I am human and you know sometimes I forget.

1 comment:

ida said...

i think gay people go threw the same things that we go threw sheila. one person will be more dominate and one will be more passive. no relationship is 100 percent 50/50. some are 90/10 (a bad one in my eyes) some are 60/40. i think the 60/40 are the better ones. and i also think sometime the relationship will flex will the one that is normally 40 becomes a 60. i personally act more like a guy in communication. i dont care for it that much. i like silance. i like to be by myself. finding a man that understands that i dont want to talk about normally girly things is hard. but finding a man that truely understands me is impossible. i dont even try anymore.