Where Monsters Lurk...

You would think I would be afraid of the darkness. I suppose on some level a small part of me is. I just can’t seem to let myself be gripped by the horror of one night. After all I have lived more than one night and I have been out many more nights where nothing went wrong than those that had mishaps. Stubborn, yes, I suppose I am. We are taught as small children to fear what lurks in the darkness. We conjure up images of monsters. Monsters so hideous in appearance that we dare not look them in the face. What I found out that night was that monsters don’t look any different than you or I. Monsters can be found among those that live within the confines of our own little community of acquaintances. Even then what the monsters take from us are nothing compared to the horror of what those we love do afterwards.

The above passage is from a book I’m writing. It seems so fitting with
this topic though I thought I would throw it out there for you to read. So
when you think of monsters do you think of the cute cuddly ones from “Monsters Inc.” or do you think of the horrid nasty little buggers from Aliens? The monsters that are lurking out there that I want to warn you about have names and walk on two legs. They have very little brain power and possess little ability to show signs of being human. I can’t give their last names without getting in trouble or their yahoo id’s or anything like that, but if you have a fear that you may know them feel free to write me and I’ll give you the details. Feel free to ask me questions. There are three guys out on the dating websites who think it’s cute to play games and try to intimidate women. Now on the dating websites one may start to feel too comfortable and at ease. I’m warning you don’t. I recently had two different guys on the sites approach me (I’m currently hidden on all the sites cause I got tired of the bull so I stopped). The first guy sent me a friend request on TAGG. Now I am a very accepting person and will attempt to be friends with almost anyone. I told this guy from the get go that I had no interest in dating him. He asked if we could just be friends, said he was dating a girl named Laurie and all he wanted was friends to talk to since she doesn’t live in Fort Wayne and he gets lonely. I saw nothing wrong with emails to keep him from being lonely if he wanted to send them. Big mistake, learn from me, don’t be that nice. He wanted to yahoo messenger so again, naive as I am I agreed. To this point no harm no fowl, until I get an email with a video of him jacking off. I sent him an email back saying I didn’t appreciate it and he pretended like he sent it in error. I told him I didn’t want anything to do with him and got rid of all his information, forgot to block him though, silly me. A couple of weeks later he pops up on
messenger asking me how my day is. I thought he was a different guy named Mark and responded. Again I got an email with a video, this time with a dark curly haired girl giving him a blow job. I went off on him. I
sent him an email asking him why on earth he would think anyone would want this. He told me I was a hateful woman. I blocked him from yahoo messenger and TAGG and I informed the health club that when I’m there and he’s there I would like a heads up because he creeps me out. Yes, unfortunately this nut bag goes to the same gym as I do. So a day later another yahoo messenger pops up from an id I don’t recognize at all. It turns out this is a guy named CJ that I had emailed a couple of times with on TAGG a month earlier and had no interest in so I had forgotten all about him. I sent him an instant message saying basically sorry I don’t recognize the id, who are you? Well the instant messaging went well for a good portion of the day. We seemed to have a lot in common and it was going well. We were going to get together over the weekend but he dropped off and I didn’t hear from him all weekend and I just assumed he lost interest. So I got a new pop up from him on Tuesday and then again on Wednesday. On Wednesday I was working with my WEBCAM and trying to figure some things out and he pops up and wants to invite himself to view my CAM. I declined his self imposed invite, which just pissed the yell out of this guy. He went nuts and told me I would in no uncertain terms let him view my CAM. He got very verbally abusive called me some very nasty names, told me I was lying to him. I simply responded that I had my rights and that he and I were not dating and I wasn’t sure what he was getting so angry about. He went off again called me an F’N C and a whore and told me he was going to make sure I was very sorry. He told me he didn’t play games. Now this was a little nerve racking, but he didn’t have my home phone number or cell or even my home address. So I was like ok so what are you going to do. I simply told him I was glad I found out about his anger issues before I met him and I’d appreciate it if he would not contact me anymore. He kept going off. I tried to be as apologetic as possible while holding my ground because he does have some seriously dramatic anger problems that he needs help with. This guy is probably the type of guy that likes to beat and strangle a woman during sex. Now that is a scary thought. Except for the fact that someone so psychotic is out there I was actually kind of relieved not to be meeting yet another guy. I kind of think I may have a relationship starting so I wasn’t sure I wanted to go anyway. What is even worse is the next morning I get another Yahoo message from this guy stating that I need to do some serious making up to him for my behavior. HUH? Yeah. Well, as it turns out other women have been bothered by CJ and his buddy Marc. Yes you read it correctly. The two nut jobs know each other. Now I blocked them, and I haven’t heard from either of them since yesterday morning so I am hoping they are smart enough to go away for my sake and for theirs. What these two idiots don’t realize is that picking on me is picking on the wrong girl. I have no qualms with letting friends and family take care of them, taking care of them myself or calling the police. I have a log of every message from these two. I’m thinking I’ll just keep that and give a copy or two to my friends. I actually know where the one works and where both of them live. I’m ahead of the game from what I can tell. Moral of the story here is be careful ladies. I suppose that goes for you guys too after having seen “Fatal Attraction.” The monsters that lurk out there don’t look any different than you or I. I do have pictures of both of these guys and I hear there is a third that works with them too. If you want to be safe I have their yahoo ids and information as well. So if you have questions ladies let me know offline I’ll be more than happy to share any information you want. One just never knows where monsters lurk.

Online Scammers - Don’t Be A Victim

So a lot of you know that I have been evaluating dating websites. I'm trying to decide if they are a good thing or a bad thing. This was done at the request of one of the websites I'm evaluating. I have to say that although I think I may have found a couple of possibilities for possible future relationships, there has been more aggravation than good as far as I can find. It seems to me, and maybe I'm being unfair, that a great majority of the people on these sites have no desire to find a real relationship, but simply want to see if they can "hookup". I am not here to talk about that sort of thing in this particular article though, so let me get on with the topic at hand. Schemers seem to crawl out of the woodwork's on these sites. It seems that they feel if you are on this site you must be desperate, which I for one am not and I doubt seriously if several of these people on here are. There are people that steal pictures off the Internet and make up a fictitious name and set out to see if they can find lonely hearts, tell them what they want to hear and then relieve them of cash. There are several facets to these scams so you really have to be on your feet. First of all anyone who professes love and devotion and they have never ever met you... get real, especially when they have only been sending you emails for a week. I have had not one, not two, but three of these schemers on my sites so far. All of them couldn't live without me and I was the only person on the planet they could trust. One wanted me to send him money because he lost his luggage and his wallet was in his luggage. now I don't mean to be mean but if you're a big enough dumb ass as to pack your wallet in your luggage instead of having it on you, then you may actually deserve to be in a foreign county with no money. I know that sounds mean, but it's how I feel. Uh, let me see do I send you money. Hell No! Then one of course was traveling out of the country, left his twelve year old son in he states, and lost his wallet. Oh NO! No Money, no friends in the states and I'm his only hope. It gets better with this one though because he wants me to actually receive a Western Union transfer of money from his 'client' and then Western Union him the money. My questions were many. He didn't like I asked them. First of all why are you trusting someone you don't know with your money? Why can't your client just wire you the money or why can't the person watching your son do it? I researched this to see where either scam comes in because it seems innocent enough to receive money by Western Union... Right? Well, if you want to be a "MULE" for money laundering or be the one who is receiving funds from someone who has been scammed by one of these idiots then yeah go ahead and accept it. You could end up in prison on federal charges. You read it right. You could be an accessory after the fact or if you don't do prison you could be liable for all the money that was taken from the scandalized person. Money orders, cashiers checks and regular checks in general can all be forged and fake and you can be liable for all that money as well. If you don't know the person, don't do money transactions with them. This is especially true if they are out of the country. I can't believe I've had three of them. I am going to share a couple of their emails just to let you see what I'm talking about. These people will always try to get personal information from you. One of them wanted my banking information for a money transfer. Yeah right. I wasn't born yesterday, or the day before for that matter. Here are some examples: Whatever you do don't be a victim.
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Dear Sheila

Life is so unpredictable. changes always come along, in big or small ways. I don't know hat happened that this sudden change has turned my world upside down. I don't know exactly it was that hit me, but there is something really special about you.

It might be all the things i see on the surface, the things that everyone notices and admires about you, qualities, capabilities.... (it goes on and on like this)

Only the most special things in my world get to come inside my heart and stay. And now I realize how deeply my life has been touched by you.

From,
Terry

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Good Morning:

How are you doing? I just can't sleeping thinking and dreaming of you angel, your thought is always in mine heart. I love nothing more than being with you. (more drivel)
Plenty of love,
Terry
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And YES two of the three were named Terry.
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Here is something else to remember too... They try to play on your sympathy. All three of these men who tried to do this to me were single dads raising a son alone who needs a mother. One said his wife died of cancer, one died in a motor accident, and one simply ran off and wanted nothing further to do with him or his son. They all at one time or another pretend to have the son type on the yahoo messenger. Theses people make calls to your home. they try to seem as real as possible. They give you phone numbers where you can call them. These are scams. Don't be taken in. Don't be a victim. If you think it sounds too good to be true, it almost always is.

WEBCAM?

It's no secret that me and technology are not friends. My friends that are into it though keep dragging and pulling me by the hair to get me caught up. I guess I'm just not overly fond of it. I mean I am one of those people, that although I have gotten use to my cellphone I dream of days gone by when you could actually escape away from everyone to places where you could not be reached. Remember going on vacation and not talking to friends and family while gone? Not to mention that I think a great romantic get away would be to go off to a cabin together with no cellphones, no televisions, no computers. Wow! I know I'm going crazy here aren't I? I just think that sometimes technology goes a little over board. I mean when you're sitting at a table with someone and you're texting them rather than talk to them there is a big problem if you ask me. Now, I have to admit to having done it if I wanted to say something private, but our kids are doing it just because it's how they communicate, so what is the harm? They are forgetting how to communicate face to face. I actually heard a radio spoof about a man whose daughter brought him his cell phone (local DJ) then went back up stairs to her room and text him the question of when dinner would be. Couldn't she have just walked down and asked him? So I finally entered into the WEB CAM game. I bought one, a cheap one to start. I didn't want to invest a lot of money until I found out if I liked it. So the verdict is I like it. It's kind of fun to be able to see the person you're talking to and have them see you, but it does have it's draw backs too. It has definitely added another layer to the online dating thing. I mean this way you can ask them if they have a cam and you can offer yours and you can see before you meet what they actually look like. What a concept. Yes the pictures on this post were taken with the web cam. The one that is blurry was my first attempt. I am getting better. So what are your opinions of modern technology? What about WEB Cam's? Do you own one? Would you want one? What ways do you think they are good or not good?

********* Plenty Of What? ***********

So after a long break from the dating world I decided to give it a whirl a few months back. It has been an interesting adventure to say the least. The dating game has changed over the years that I took myself out of it. Did you know that “hooking up” is now terminology for get together to have sex? Funny when I say it I mean lets do lunch or dinner or a movie. People also now have a more open concept to when sex should be started in a relationship. I for one don’t think it should be on the first date. So I decided to check out some of the websites out there for singles. The three I chose to check out where “ZOOKS” on face book, www.LatinoPeopleMeet.com and www.plentyoffish.com which is a free website. The “ZOOKS” website and “Latino People” both charge you a monthly service fee to utilize their websites. I doubt I will be a member for more than one month on either of the chargeable sites. I haven’t found them to be much different than the one that is free so why bother. I tried “ZOOKS” simply because it was connected to face book. On it I have only found one guy that I would consider relationship interest to me, but did find one that is a friend interest so I guess it has been worth it on that. On Latino People I have found several prospects but so far nothing that has come to have anything come of it. I joined that site because Latin mean get my blood to pumping. Unfortunately a lot of the guys on there don’t get that a woman might be on that website because she’s looking for Latin men, but then I guess the men could say the same about the women. I’m not Latin. When I first signed up, the first website I signed up for was Plenty of Fish. What an awful name first of all. Shouldn’t we women be offended? I guess I’m over it though because I have had seven dates in the last two weeks off that site. When I first signed up for the site though I sort of felt like fresh bait in a piranha tank. I couldn’t believe how quickly and how many emails I got. I started out trying to be friendly for niceness sake with anyone who emailed me. Trust me when I say I’ve gotten over that rather quickly as I was asked a bunch of things I really don’t find polite conversation. It’s amazing though how asked by one can offend you and by another not so much. I guess human nature that if someone attractive asks it doesn’t sound as bad? That is bad isn’t it? What kills me though is one guy I had great emails going on with I gave my cell number and the first thing he did was send me a picture of himself in a Speedo. Let me tell you this guy should NEVER be seen in a Speedo and I guess his sending me that picture should have been a clue to run right then and there. Since he and I had such good emailing conversations before that though I tried to look past the ugly picture that was now embedded in my mind. I mean after all personality can make people who may not be that attractive, attractive to me. So what happens. This guy not only tells me he wears a size sixteen shoe and he hopes “size” isn’t a problem for me, but then he tells me he has a “lip” fetish and likes them big (no he wasn’t talking about the ones on my face, I know sick right?). Oh and get this… the final icing on this guys cake was that he told me he had to sleep with me to find out if there was a possibility of a second date. Say what? What a conceited, selfish, idiot this guy was. He’s a fireman in Elkhart too. Feel sorry for them. At least he really was good at putting out fires cause I wanted him before he revealed himself to be the big jerk that he was. Fire successfully put out. Good job Mr. Fireman. Then there was a twenty-one year old guy who wanted to VTEXT me naked pictures of himself so I could see if I wanted to screw him or not because he definitely wanted to hook up with me. First of all he’s young enough to be my son, secondly I’m not sure that is a good foundation for a relationship, of course I really don’t think he was looking for a relationship. Then there is this one that seems really sweet and all, but I’m thinking he has a wife or a girlfriend. He’s never on in the evenings or weekends… .only seems to be on from work. I’m thinking what is wrong with that picture? My over all opinion though.. I think it is possible that on one of these sites one could find a good relationship. I had a very enjoyable dinner on Thursday night with a man and laughed and laughed. On Friday night I enjoyed the company of a very nice man as well. So I guess they do exists. I also met someone not on the website… Not sure any of them are the one but I guess time will tell. I don’t really see a reason to pay a website with a free one out there though. I also think there are some old fashioned ways that are still good to find a date. At least on Plenty of Fish you know right up front whether the person has kids and whether they want more or not. For me that is a big issue right there. I mean if I never have children I am fine with it, but if I get with a guy that wants kids then he needs to know one or two at the most at my age. There are lots more guys I could tell you about on these dating sites and I am sure they have their own war stories, but for now I am going to give it a little more time and see what happens. I will update you as I go along. As they say for now I guess I will keep fishing and see if anything nips at the bait. Again, plenty of what?

Got An Asphalt Driveway?

If you've got an asphalt driveway then you are probably starting to see the door to door people coming around to see if they can seal it for you. Am I right? Well, you could go with them, but you may pay more and get less than you would get with my friend Ken and his partner. They will do you a righteous job at a good price. I personally will vouch for Ken's integrity and would love to see my friends get treated right. Call them for a free estimate at 260-693-4117 today.

It’s Not Just For Kids….

What am I talking about? Cheerios cereal is what I am speaking about of course. You thought I was talking about Trix didn’t you. I mean that is what the commercial always claimed, that Trix was for kids. At the health club yesterday I got into a conversation with several women and found that I am not the only one who uses cereal as a snack instead of eating it in a bowl with milk for breakfast. I don’t like milk so I don’t drink it very often and I need the fiber and some of the vitamins you can find in cereal so I will often package up a baggie with cereal and eat on it as a snack throughout the day. I figure it beats candy and junk food and it can be very beneficial in many ways health wise. I was going to type up some facts, but I found a WEB page that has it all ready done for me, so check it out… Add a little cereal to your diet and avoid that mid afternoon candy bar.

http://www.acaloriecounter.com/breakfast-cereal.php

A Final Kiss

It was an exceptionally cold January. Icicles had formed on the window panes and a cold chill had settled in her very bones that she couldn’t quiet shake. Normally a hot shower would knock the chill right out of her, but it wasn’t working. She also noticed that her energy just seemed to be depleted. Shaking her head she slowly forced herself up off the sofa. She’d have to be to work in a couple of short hours and she had a lot she needed to get done before leaving. She was sure it was nothing more than the winter dreary’s. The fact that the sun hadn’t shown itself in almost a month was enough to depress anyone’s body and mind. In the pit of her stomach there was a gnawing hunger. That also was out of place for her. She normally didn’t even get the first pang of hunger until the late afternoon. The fleeting thought that it must be an emotionally charged hunger swept through her mind. At work that evening she found she was feeling dizzy and even more tired. She also noticed a slight tingle of a headache that lurked in the background of her mind. Although she was still hungry even after having eaten several things, there was also a feeling of nausea that was sweeping over her. She was still so cold even though the thermometer read seventy-six degrees in her building. It must be mental crossed her mind yet again. She muddled through the rest of the day and was extremely glad when it was time to go home. At home she kissed her husband as he was all ready there when she got there. She smiled at him and told him she was going to lie down for a few minutes prior to fixing their evening meal. He jokingly told her he didn’t know if he could wait that long, but then gave her a soft and gentle kiss on the lips and told her to get some rest, that he would make the evening meal and wake her when it was done. She sighed and walked off to the bedroom. She still didn’t feel quiet right. Great she thought, now my right arm is also aching. Damn arthritis. Getting older just isn’t fun and again she blamed the weather for making her miserable. No wonder people move to Florida when they get older she thought. As she lay down on the bed she smiled at the thoughtfulness of her husband and that soft and gentle kiss that he had given her just a few short minutes ago. Two hours later her husband came to wake her. He walked into the room and panic struck his eyes. Why did he look so distraught? She watched as he walked across the room to where her now icy body lay. Understanding now dawned on her own expression. Andrea had a heart attack shortly after lying down for her nap. She wasn’t going to be enjoying that dinner that her husband had so thoughtfully made her. She wasn’t going to have to worry about the winter cold any longer. Andrea had died in her bedroom shortly after lying down for a nap. That last gentle kiss was her final one. So what is this story about? It’s actually based on a true story of someone I knew. Not someone I knew very well, but someone I knew none the less. It’s the story of how a woman had symptoms of a heart attack all day and didn’t give it a second thought. It’s the story of how if she had not made an excuse for all that her body was trying to tell her she might have realized what was going on. Any one symptom by itself might have been something she could have passed by, but she had multiple symptoms. Women don’t usually have the same symptoms as men when they are having a heart attack. The most common symptoms for women are unusual fatigue, sleeping disturbances, shortness of breath, indigestion and anxiety. Most don’t ever have chest pain. As women or I suppose even men, we need to know our bodies and listen to what they are telling us. They do let us know. As in today I was craving eggs. Was it really eggs I needed? No, yesterday I gave blood at the doctors for tests. My body was just letting me know it was low on iron and needed proteins and other vitamins to build it back up. After I ate some shaved beef and some nuts and crackers the craving for eggs went away. Learn to listen to what your body tells you. It could possibly save your life. For more information on women and heart diseases check out this web page:

http://www.womensheart.org/content/HeartAttack/heart_attack_symptoms_risks.asp

The final kiss in this story probably didn't have to be her final one... will you let it be yours?

J. Devon Mathias

J. DEVON MATHIAS, 81, of Warren, passed away on Wednesday, March 24, 2010, at Heritage Pointe. He was born Nov. 21, 1928, in South Whitley, and taught and served as an administrator in the Lagrange, Pleasant Township and Fort Wayne Community Schools public school systems for 39 years. Mr. Mathias was a member of Waynedale United Methodist Church and served there in many capacities for over 50 years. He was past President of the Southside Optimist Club, Sertoma, the Retired Teachers Association and Sigma Phi Epsilon. He was also a member of the Summit City Barbershop Chorus and organized the We the People civic education program in northeast Indiana for many years. He deeply loved gardening and was a longtime certified Master Gardener and docent at the Botannical Conservatory. Surviving are his two sons, Paul (Carlabeth) Mathias of Fishers and Mark (Debra) Mathias of Irvine, Calif.; sister, Shirley Sylvester of Dahlonega, Ga.; grandsons, Ethan and Corbin Mathias; and granddaughters, Caitlin and Marissa Mathias. Preceding Mr. Mathias in passing are his parents, Homer and Audra (Gerkin) Mathias; and his wife Amaryllis (Moore) Mathias. Service is 3 p.m. Friday, April 9, 2010, at Waynedale United Methodist Church, 2501 Church Street, Fort Wayne, with calling two hours prior to service at the church. Burial in Lakeview Cemetery, Larwill, Ind. Preferred memorials to Waynedale United Methodist Church, the Friends of Epworth Forest or Alzheimer's Association at http://www.alz.org/ - To leave condolences please visit http://www.elzey-patterson-rodakfuneralhome.com/

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What can someone say about someone as special as Devon Mathias. He walked tall among men. He loved people and he loved life. His joy seemed to be in helping the young and impressionable find their way in life and to know their worth. He was kind and compassionate and always had a welcoming smile when you would meet him out and about. Mr. Mathias was one of my seventh grade teachers, but to tell you the truth I really don't recall much about what he was like in the class room. I worked for him and his wife, Amy, after school and on weekends as did my brother. Looking back I know that their goal was to help mentor and teach us about the working world and the worth of a hard earned dollar. Amy was a bit of a health food fanatic though and young teenage kids most often are not that into the health foods, or the claim chowder that she would prepare for lunch. I rarely enjoyed the meals she would fix, but I always appreciated the effort that went into them. One very fond memory I have of Mr. Mathias was that when Amy would go out for the day as she often did, usually to go to her school to prepare lessons and such, she would leave pre-cooked meals for Devon to heat up for us at lunch time. He loved his wife very much, but was a practical man who knew children did not enjoy these meals so looking back it makes me smile to remember how he would throw out whatever she had made and either order a pizza, go get fast food or make hot dogs for us to eat. He would always wink and say "Don't tell Mrs. Mathias, lets keep this to ourselves." I don't think he meant her any disrespect as I have said the love he held for her was more than apparent. He was a good man who everyone who knew him was blessed to have known him. I wish his family peace in knowing he's gone on to be with his beloved Amy and my heart goes out to each and every one of you.

Just Out of Reach

If you ask me what my favorite tool in my house is I'm going to have to go with the "Gopher grab & reaching" tool. It of course is one of those "As Seen On TV" products. I am forever more needing something off a top shelf or dropping something behind the stove or washer or dryer. So I keep this hanging in my kitchen. I can just grab it and then use it to grab whatever has fallen out of my reach. I think it's a must have for every home. I have even used it to reach for stuff back under the bed. It retails for around seven to ten dollars so it's really not all that expensive and to save one aggravation when something seems lost, it really seems well worth the cost to me. So next time something is just out of reach are you going to have your Gopher? I'm just asking...

*** Plan B ***

Let me start by saying it is my opinion that everyone is entitled to their
opinion whether they are right or wrong. Seriously though the opinions
expressed in this blog are mine and are not meant to insult anyone or upset
anyone, just to make you stop and think and to give you the opportunity to
express your opinion on the topic as well. This just happens to be on my
mind. --- If you’re super sensitive to this topic you may want to sit this
one out.

Abstinence is the safest form of birth and disease control. That is what they say, right? Well, one would have to agree and could hardly argue that they are correct. The problem here is it is not happening. You know it and I know it. I’m not for promoting sex in teenagers so don’t even go there with me; however, I do feel it’s a parent’s responsibility to talk to their children about sex and to teach them and prepare them to keep them safe. My parents, God I do love them, but they never had any form or fashion of a sex talk with me. Heck my mom didn’t tell me about my menstrual cycle until I had all ready been on it a year and using her pads. Guess she didn’t notice. My parents are and always have been and will be old fashioned. Nothing wrong with it, except with society the way it is today we can not afford to not inform our children of the facts. The fact is that Aids is real. The fact is that once you have a girl pregnant, there is no turning back, no matter the choice you make. Yes I said choice. I know it’s a word that gets the pro-life folks standing in line to beat down doors and yeah to an extent I’m with you because I am pro-life, but I am also pro-choice. So how can I be both? That is an easy answer. I don’t believe I or anyone else has the right to make choices for anyone else or to tell them what their relationship with God is or how their body should have to suffer. And before you go there I have all ready heard the argument about watching a child be neglected and no I wouldn’t stand by and watch someone beat a kid, but I don’t see this as the same thing, sorry, save your breath. I would never dream of asking a girl who was the victim of rape or incest or who might die while doing so to carry a baby that she couldn’t possibly want. On the other hand if she aborts it she’ll have that cross to hang on to for I’m sure it has to be an emotional roller coaster. I seriously don’t think there is anything that could make me abort a baby, but I’ll also tell you that at this point in my life I don’t want children of my own. As much as that probably is to the dislike of my mom and dad I don’t. I don’t even know if I want a husband, let alone kids. A partner to share life is a wonderful thought, but finding that right person is tricky. I like my life for the most part the way it is. So with that said, we know people are not going without sex, but are they being safe with sex? I have talked to several people that claim they just can’t stand to have sex using a condom. So I suppose they like the idea of and STD? I’m here to tell you that if the choice is no sex or using a condom most people will use one so girls don’t let the guys tell you that and guys don’t let the girl hood wink you. While we are on that subject guys really you do need to know if you can trust your partner. I mean just because a girl says she’s on the pill don’t make it so. I had an ex room mate who purposely got pregnant knowing the guy was from a hard core Catholic family and that the guy would marry her. I think it was wrong and I doubt it ever came with a happily ever after the way she might have thought, but I’m telling you there are girls out there that will do it. And girls you need to be doubling up on your security too. Just because he wears a condom doesn’t mean it won’t break or he hasn’t damaged it or lubes might make it less effective. Seriously sex is not to be treated lightly. It comes with emotional and physical ramifications. Now, if you do find yourself in a bind ladies where the condom breaks or you’re in a “hurry” and don’t ask him to wear one or oops didn’t take my pill today, there is a product out there you can buy called “The Plan B Pill”. It’s not meant to be a permanent form of birth control and trust me when I say you wouldn’t want it to be. Walgreen's sells it for around $45, Wal-Mart’s around $55. The difference is that Walgreen's is a two pill taken at 12 hour intervals where Wal-Mart’s sells a single dose pill. What is this pill? Simply put it is a pill that prevents fertilization and ovulation. Yes I said prevents fertilization, so if you take it you are not killing a living human being because one hasn’t been created yet. I know there are still people out there that think it’s wrong because you should allow God to decide, but this pill is no different than using a condom or taking the pill to me. Even with that said though there are several pharmacies that refuse to carry this pill simply because of the religious up roar that it comes with. It is often referred to as a morning after pill, but is not exactly the same pill. This one works to stop fertilization from ever happening in the first place. This pill needs to be taken within 72 hours of having unprotected sex or from the time of whatever occurred to make you suspect you need it. The longer you wait the less likely it will work and ladies there is only an 89% change it will work in the first place. I know that sounds like a good number, but it leaves 11% odds in favor of becoming pregnant. I’m just saying. This pill does have some side effects that can occur and I would highly recommend you read up on it long before ever needing it to make sure it’s an option, but it is out there and it is available should the need arise and for those that are thinking it’s expensive, well how much does it cost to raise a child these days? So if you’re in doubt you might want to take a chance and roll the dice, or see your Walgreens or Wal-Mart’s pharmacists and get “The Plan B Pill”. It’s just another option for you. So if you hadn’t heard, I wanted you to know there was one available. Again, this is all only my opinion.

Colgate Wisp

I'm sure there are other brands of this same type of product, but the only one I have tried to this point in time is the Colgate Wisp in Cinnamint. I have to say this is a clever little product and if you haven't tried it you really should. I keep them in my car. They are wonderful for if you've eaten something and you need to freshen your breath and make your mouth feel more human. It's a product I have to say I'm quiet addicted to at this point in time. So pick some up today... Trust me you've got nothing, other than money ;-), to lose.

To Drink or Not To Drink...

To drink or not to drink that is the question. Yeah but before you get too excited let me tell you I’m not talking about liquor. What am I talking about? I’m of course talking about water. Did you know that your body is comprised of over 50% water? They say the average male is about 60% and the average female about 55%. Your blood is comprised of 70% water. Lean muscle in the body is 75% water by weight. The human brain is 90 to 95% water. So now you’re going, “Yeah and so what?” Most people do not seem to like to drink water that I talk to. As with anything else I’ve found that water is an acquired taste. Yes I said taste. So many people tell me all the time it has no taste, but to me it does, and if it really doesn’t then why not drink it? The thing is that water is vital to your health and your well being. Did you know that drinking just 2% less than the required daily amount of water that your body needs can cause dehydration, headaches, fatigue, nausea, and forgetfulness? Let us not forget to mention that your body in its need for water will make you hungry when it actually wants water? Yep that is correct, next time you’re thinking you’re really hungry and you shouldn’t be you should drink a good 8 to 16 ounces of water to see if it goes away. Your body will crave foods because it can draw water from them. To your body it’s logical. Here is another kicker too: You can not drink soda and think you’re getting water. There is no useable source of fluid for the body in soda. Caffeine will actually dehydrate the water you have. The plain old facts are that you need to drink actual water to maintain a healthy balance. Your skin will even look healthier and your hair too if you start drinking enough of it. This doesn’t mean go over kill though because there is such a think as too much water. Every heard of too much of a good thing? The average person should consume 64 to 120 ounces of water on any given day. Still don’t think you can do it because you hate water? Well there are flavored waters sold in stores, but most of those have carbonation which is hard on the intestinal tract, but they are still a valid option. They will not be the same as plain water, but they will help. My favorite option and one I’ve been given approval by medical staff on is the Wyler’s to go and the Crystal light to go packs. If you’re not in the mood for plain water you can carry these with you and add them to water for flavoring. They contain about 5 calories a pack and are extremely good. Still plain water is better but this will work. They do not really cost all that much either. The Wyler’s drink mixes are 10 packs for $1 at Walgreens or about $1.18 at Wal-Mart’s. The Crystal Light is going to run you around $2.29 to $2.99 depending on whether you want energy drinks, regular, or immune fighting properties in the drink mix. Either way you can’t go wrong by adding a little water. Now it’s true until your body adjusts to your drinking a lot of water you will more than likely be making more trips to the bathroom, but hey look at it this way, added exercise. Your body does regulate and that slacks off after it adjusts to the amount you are drinking though. You should notice an improved difference in the way you feel after only a week and you will also notice that after a couple of weeks you really start wanting water. What are some of my favorite drink mixes? My very favorite drinks are Crystal Light Raspberry Lemonade and Wyler’s Grape. I take them with me when I go to restaurants. Extra bonus there in that I don’t buy a drink I just simply get water and add my own flavor. How can you beat that? Now the question for you is simply: To drink or not to drink? That is the question.

McFrappes?

I’m not really much for flavored coffees and I’m definitely not a cappuccino girl. Normally I like my coffee either with two sweet-n-lows only or sometimes I’ll add cream too. Now, I’m not apposed to adding a little Irish Cream (real, not imitation) to my coffee or even Bailey’s, but I really just don’t get the fascination with the flavored drinks, but then of course I like the taste of coffee. I didn’t always. Like most things in life coffee is an acquired taste. None of us come out of the womb and immediately go yeah baby coffee. I worked a part time job for the Fort Wayne Children’s zoo in the middle to late 80’s. I loved that job. It wasn’t a job made to pay very much, but the people where friendly and fun for the most part and it was good honest work. Earl Wells was one of the nicest people you’d ever want to meet, as is Jim Anderson who replaced Earl. I had a lot of good times back then. More innocent in my way of thinking but I did learn a lot of hard life lessons while working there. I also learned to love coffee. I worked at the zoo year round which meant several long winter days out in the freezing cold weather doing all sorts of things. The worst I can remember is using a huge hose to clear paths of ice and snow. I would go in to the break room frozen solid and somehow something cold just was not going to cut it. The only thing hot there was of course coffee which I quickly learned to drink just to warm myself up. Before I knew what was happening not only did I drink it, but I sort of craved it. Now I’m not a die hard like some of my friends and family. I have a coffee pot at home, but I rarely use it. I usually use those little tea bag coffee’s if I’m at home and want one. Me hyped up on a whole pot of coffee isn’t a pretty thing. As most of my friends will attest I normally have enough energy all on my own without it. So today I had a coupon to try McDonald's new Caramel Frappe. I thought it would probably be a waste of my time in that I’ve rarely found any flavored coffee drink I like and I sure as heck don’t like their iced coffee’s, but it was free so I figured why not? I’ve got to tell you… I LOVED IT! I could definitely see this little drink getting addictive, although I was half tempted not to get it and to get a shamrock shake (forgot those were out now and I love them). I settled on the drink I went in for though and I was not disappointed in the least. Nutrient wise a small one of these has about 130 calories (50 of which come from fat), 5 grams of fat (3.5 of which is saturated), 20 mg of cholesterol, 40 mg of sodium, 21 grams of sugar, 1 gram of protein, 200 vitamin a (IU) and 40 mg of calcium. All in all that isn’t really that bad. I wouldn’t advice drinking them by the gallons but for a little afternoon pick me up, especially after spending a few hours at the gym, it’s really not that bad. Hey and what better way to put a little boost into your afternoon than with whip cream and caramel? OK, I am talking about on the drink here guys!

Easy, Fast and Free...

Filed your taxes yet? I have. I know tons of people who go out every year and buy Turbo Tax or some other software to do their taxes. Then I know people who pay someone else to do them and a few who do their own and grumble and complain as they try to figure it all out. Me? My dad usually does the papers for me. This year though I decided I wanted to try e-filing, but I really had no desire to spend the money to get Turbo Tax to do it, so I visited a couple of websites. One was www.in.gov and the other was www.irs.gov both websites provide you with access to government approved and totally free e-filing capabilities. So I filed my Federal taxes last Monday afternoon. They found $400 that we hadn't found when I did my original tax forms and guess what... My refund was deposited Friday morning into my checking account. Yep, totally free and four days turn around. How can you really beat that? Now I just filed my state taxes today. We will have to see if they can 'Get R Done' as fast as the Feds... So if you ask me there isn't any better way to go than easy, fast and FREE.

Bodycology - Walmarts

So yesterday I was shopping at Walmarts and went into the cosmetics isle. Needed eye shadow... I found a line of products called "Bodycology". Not a name I was familiar with and definitely not very expensive, but I thought for the gym these could be nice to have so I of course got the shower gel, the body lotion, and the body spray. I had five different women at the gym tell me how great it smelled along

with two guys and then several people where I work. The scent I went with was called 'Sweet Petals'. I suppose you don't always have to spend a fortune to find something nice. The body lotion is awesome too just so you know. It's not greasy and leaves your skin feeling silky smooth. Give them whirl if you've a mind to.

Campbell's Harvest Select Soups

If you haven't tried these soups you really should. They are low calorie and low sodium so whether you're watching your calorie intake or your sodium intake (of which I watch both) you are all set with these soups. Most of them are less than a hundred calories a serving. The one on the left is a microwave ready container you can take to work and it has only a hundred calories in the whole container of two servings. Again, if you're looking for something to fill you up, but not fill you out. You might want to give these bad boys a try. I did and I love them!

Working It Out!

Recently I signed back up to go to American Health Fitness. It's winter and my walking, although I still manage to get some in has been hampered by the winter weather. I hate very few things worse than cold weather. In reality as I lose this last hundred pounds I need to start tightening and strengthening my muscles anyway. I also use to belong to American Health several years ago and enjoyed it tremendously. So although I did check other clubs, I went back to where I always felt comfortable. At American Health there are a wide array of people in there working out and all of them appear to be friendly. As one girl stated today no one cares what anyone looks like or in what condition they are in inside this gym, they are just happy you're here to work out. I have seen every type from the extremely physically fit, to a few that are probably five hundred pounds if they are an ounce with a long road to travel yet. I also was fascinated by the eighty-six year old woman that was bench pressing, and the guy with green hair that upon leaving was wearing a shirt and tie and dress pants. Most of the people have been super friendly and nice. Now there are a few odd balls, but hey they keep life interesting. The staff is friendly and eager to answer your questions on anything you might want to know. They will even keep keys at their desk for you while you exercise if you don't want to have to keep track of it. So my biggest obstacle will be getting into some kind of routine on the machines. I'm no different than anyone else that going by myself and working out on those things leaves me feeling a little awkward, but I will do it. I went Friday night and swam and worked out in the water for about two and a half hours. I could live in the pool. I wish I had enough money to have an indoor pool at my house so I could swim all the time. On Saturday I started my morning off with an hour work out with the club trainer, went to lunch and then went back to the club and stayed another 3 hours doing different workouts both on machines and in the water. Today I went and worked out in the water again. My muscles were too sore to do machines today.... that is the great thing about the pool, as sore as my muscles were it was easy to still do a workout in the water and trust me when I say you get a harder work out in the water than a person might expect. What really kills me though are the people who come in do nothing on the machines, head to the pool and then just stand around and talk in the pool. How exactly does that count as exercise? I suppose maybe they joined just to use the pool and socialize, but that is just hard to imagine. For me though it's well worth the money. I pay $19 a month, which is less than a dollar a day. Cheap entertainment and beneficial to my health too. What more could a girl ask for? American Health offers a sauna, a steam room, a eucalyptus room, a hot tub, trainers, every possible machine you could think of, and even a wellness program. Their wellness program has meetings and health monitoring as well as a tailored exercise program for each person. I like it. If you wanna join I might even allow you to work out with me. ;) There are two locations in Fort Wayne, and multiple classes you can take as well. Below here I have the pictures and maps from the website of American Health Fitness - http://www.ahfc.com/

Step/Cardio, MON-SAT 8:30AM & TUE/THUR 6:30PM

Core/Fusion/Pilates, MON-FRI 9:15AM

Aquatics, MON/WED/FRI 9AM/10AM/11AM & 6PM (except Fridays, no 6pm on Fridays)

Yoga, MON/THUR 5:30PM -- Step, TUE/THU 10AM & 6:30PM -- Power Pump MON 7PM

Yoga, MON/WED/FRI 9AM

Power Pump, SAT 9:45AM

Step, MON/WED 5:30PM

Core Fusion, TUE 7PM

Kick Boxing, THUR 7PM

Keith Whitley, Country Legend

Growing up in my home we were constantly surrounded by country music, sixties rock and roll and gospel. My parents were born and raised in a small town called Pippa Passes in the mountains of Kentucky. I suppose in all honestly I heard quiet a bit of blue grass music too, although for me sometimes it’s hard to distinguish between blue grass and country. I mean I do know the difference, but they both instill the same qualities in my mind. I was a normal teenager though and went through a brief period in the late seventies and early eighties where I didn’t listen to a whole lot of country and did the rock and roll thing, well as best as I could in my home. My parents didn’t restrict us a lot on what we could listen to, but they did have their limits. My dad use to say my music didn’t make any sense to him, but then I’d just remind him he liked “Little Richard”. I didn’t quiet think that music made much sense to me at the time. In the later half of the eighties I went through a period where all I listened to seemed to be country. To me it was a life line of words that told me I wasn’t alone in some of the emotions I was feeling. A good country song can get right to the core of your being if you truly listen to it. It was then that I ran across Keith Whitley and his amazing voice and talent. Listening to his songs I could almost feel his sadness and understanding that life isn’t always what one hopes it might be. There was also a beauty in the tones and quality of his delivery. It didn’t take me long to be hooked and I had to have everything he recorded and put out there. When he died in 1989 it nearly broke my heart, not because I thought him attractive, but because I was saddened for the songs he would never write or sing in the future. He is a talent I think is missing and one rarely anyone ever comes close to matching. To me he is the epitome of country music exemplified. Keith Whitley charted nineteen singles on the Billboard country charts and out of those he had five consecutive number ones: “Don’t Close Your Eyes”, “When You Say Nothing at All”, “I’m No Stranger to the Rain”, “I Wonder Do You Ever Think of Me”, and “It Ain’t Nothing”. The Last two songs listed were not released until after Keith Whitley’s death. Although I love most of his work, my favorite song of his and one I can relate to very intimately is “I’m Over You”. It’s the song of a man trying to convince himself that he doesn’t still have feelings for someone no longer in his life. I’ve been there done that, but in the end I think I really am over my past. I wonder if the man in the song was ever over his love. I know what it’s like to sit at a bar and drink and to go endless days hurting for something you’ve lost. So to me it’s my favorite work of his.

I’m Over You

Where there's a cloud, don't mean there's rain

Tears in my eyes, don't mean there's pain

Don't flatter yourself

I'm over you

Things aren't always what they seem

You can't believe everything you read

On my face

I'm over you

You heard I'm drinking more than I should

That I ain't been looking all that good

Someone told you I was taking it rough

Why they making those stories up

When I'm over you

There were times that if you'd been around

You would have seen me broken down

But now you won't

I'm over you

So if I seem a little bit cold

It only means you've lost the hold

You had on me

I'm over you

You heard I'm drinking more than I should
That I ain't been looking all that good
Someone told you I was taking it rough
Why they making those stories up
When I'm over you

You heard I'm drinking more than I should
That I ain't been looking all that good
Someone told you I was taking it rough
Why they making those stories up
When I'm over you

I'm over you

I'm over you

.

To me this song speaks volumes. I still sit and wonder sometimes what other wonderful songs might have been born if he had lived, or if he would have faded into the back ground like a star burning out. Either way his passing at his peak has forever sealed him in as a country legend.

Winter Reading.... Recommendation

Most of the people I talk to say they enjoy reading a lot more during the winter months when they can’t enjoy the great outdoors. I like reading late at night before going to bed mostly. Either way I found the Argeneau Series of books by Lynsay Sands most enjoyable. My favorite book due to its great sense of humor was by far was book number seven, “The Accidental Vampire”. The humorous storey of a woman who became a vampire but had absolutely no clue how she got to be one. The great thing about this series is it really doesn’t matter what order you read the books in. They are a compilation of the family Argeneau and how each of them finds their mate and the adventure that takes them there. Heck if you look at the list they weren’t even written in the sequence of events as they unfolded. There are twelve books in all and each is sure to thrill you. My second favorite in the series is, “The Immortal Hunter”. I did so enjoy each and every one of these books and yes I have them should anyone want to borrow them. Of course you must agree to give them back. I can’t wait for the next in the series to come out either. It comes out in January. I’m getting excited. Here you have it though… this is my suggested reading for a little light winter reading. Romance and humor are hard to beat I would say.

1. A Quick Bite (November 2005)




2. Love Bites (January 2004)




3. Single White Vampire (September 2003)




4. Tall, Dark & Hungry (July 2004)




5. A Bite to Remember (July 2006)




6. Bite Me If You Can (February 2007)




7. The Accidental Vampire (January 2008)




8. Vampires Are Forever (February 2008)




9. Vampire Interrupted (March 2008)




10. The Rogue Hunter (September 2008)




11. The Immortal Hunter (March 2009)




12. The Renegade Hunter (September 2009)

Diet's (Food Choices) 101!

I thought I would take a moment just to share a little of what I have learned over my journey to losing weight and getting healthy. I get asked a lot how I’m doing it. It’s not a magical pill (although wouldn’t that be nice). I am doing it the good old fashioned way of exercise and diet. I walked during the summer about forty to sixty miles a week. As it’s gotten colder I’m down between twenty and thirty, but I have added more on the home front for doing exercise bike, weight training, WII and sit ups and leg lifts. I figure adding the extra will help balance the not getting to walk as much as I would like. I also have added more time on my feet and less time on the sofa watching the “boob tube”. I only watch about an hour of television a day now and sometimes not even that. I do read quiet a bit, but I work it so that I do it after exercise or will riding the exercise bike. I even find more excuses to get up and move around at work. Sitting for hours on end just isn’t happening with me anymore. As for the diet end of it, I know there are several to choose from. The way I chose to approach it was to work with my doctor and discuss my own health concerns and the best approach. I believe everyone should do this when dieting and don’t just ask them for a diet list. You know if you do that they are going to give you something you will never follow. If you actually tell your doctor ahead of time so he can plan on allowing time and then actually tell him what you like and what you need you can work it out with him. For me the chose of diets was easy. I started having blood pressure issues. Blood pressure is directly affected by sodium in foods, so the doctor suggested I work with a dietician and learn about sodium in foods and how it affects the body. My goal that was set was to attempt to take in no more than 1200 to 1500 mg of sodium in any given day. Me, being who I am set my goal at 1000 mg a day rather than what they gave me. You see I know from personal experience how easy it is to say a little over won’t hurt, so by setting it to 1000 if I hit 1200 I was still ok. I actually kept a log at first and I read labels of everything I bought to check the sodium content. At first calories and carbohydrates didn’t matter. I needed to learn about sodium first. I also started going on line and checking fast food menu’s and nutrition charts prior to going out to get my meals as well. I sort of became fixated on sodium. I started using non-salted butter in my cooking and I even bought low sodium foods to stock. Until I did all this I didn’t’ realize that even a bag of carrots has sodium in them. Did you realize that a 12oz can of diet coke has 50 mg of sodium in it? How about this? Did you realize that a single Reese’s cup has 210 mg of sodium? When you are only allowing yourself 1200 mg of sodium a day it doesn’t take long to add up. I started telling myself that once I hit my sodium count for the day, no matter what it was or when then I was done. I might eat an apple or something (of which yes still has sodium) but I would eat very little if anything after I hit my allotted sodium for the day. I started feeling better within a couple of days. It amazed me. I also added more water to my diet because water helps remove sodium from the body. Before I realized it I had lost sixty pounds. That was the first leg of my getting off the weight. After that diet started me I added the walking an exercise and the rest as they say is history. I thought I would give you some interesting facts and figures in here though too. I found I had a lot of misconceptions about the foods out there and what was healthiest for me and what wasn’t. So I am going to give you some restaurant choices and lets see which ones you would pick for healthy and which ones not.

Which one is the better choice: Two hamburgers and a small fry from McDonalds or a Taco Bell Chipotle Steak Taco Salad from Taco Bell?

Ok, I’m not a doctor, but from what I’ve learned I’ll tell you which one I would choose and why. Although the salad sounds like the more sensible option because it has the word “salad” in it, I would go with the McDonald’s hamburgers and fries. Of course knowing me I would probably do just one hamburger and a small fry but that is me. Now actually you should normally stay away from red meats for the most part when dieting; however, in this scenario if these are your two options the salad is not going to be the better option on a diet. The Taco Bell Chipotle Steak Salad has 890 Calories in it. Of which there are 57 grams of fat, 11 grams saturated fats, 1700 mg of sodium, and 28 grams of protein and 70 grams of carbohydrates. Did you notice the 1700 mg of sodium? How about the 57 grams of fat? Now let’s look at the McDonald’s meal. Both hamburgers and the small fry have a combined total of 730 calories. Out of these 730 calories (which is less than the salad) there are 29 grams of fat, 8 grams saturated fat, 1200 mg of sodium, 91 grams of carbohydrates, and 27 grams of protein. I’m not advocating eating any fast food, but we all know we are going to do it from time to time. The thing to do when you’re eating out is know which options are actually the better ones when dieting. I asked a few friends to tell me different items they felt were healthy and low sodium, low calories at various restaurants. I found that many of them had the same misgivings I had. Examples: Arby’s sells a Roast Chicken Club sandwich. Almost everyone I talked to thought it would be good on a diet, but I am here to tell you I am not picking it. This sandwich has 460 Calories of which 170 are from fat, 39 grams of carbohydrates and 1490 mg of sodium. Now granted it’ lower on the calorie scale, but the sodium content will kill you. Sodium causes the body to retain fat and water. Just a heads up for you there in case you didn’t know. From Burger King the Tender grill garden salad comes in with 460 calories, 29 grams of fat, 31 grams of protein, 19 carbohydrates and hold on to your hat, 1450 mg of sodium. So basically eat this and you’re done for the day. Believe it or not I would eat a whopper (probably junior for me) before eating this salad. Now a full size whopper has 670 calories, 40 grams of fat, and 1020 grams of sodium. So yes I would have more fat and more calories, but then again my diet has been based around watching my sodium. If we look at the whopper jr. which is what I would probably eat then we find the following: 370 Calories, 21 grams of fat and 560 mg of sodium. This to me is the better option for me in my mind. If I go to Culvers I eat a single butter burger. Why, it fills me up and it has 346 Calories and 700 mg of sodium. Still not my chosen foods, but if I find I’m there and I’m hungry I am going to look for what I feel has the lesser sodium content. IHOP has a meal of Tilapia and steamed broccoli that only has 360 calories and 580 mg of sodium. I love it. I always have them put the hollandaise sauce on the side because I’m not a fan of it, but even if I add French fries to this meal I can still stay within my diet. There are options out there, but the first thing you need to do is arm yourself with information. PIZZA is TABU…. Sorry, it’s just the plain old facts of life. I have started only allowing myself pizza about once every six months. Two Slices of pepperoni pizza has 1600 mg of sodium in it (Pizza Hut). Not to mention a ton of empty calories and fat. How many people stop with two slices of pizza? The easiest way I think for most people to start is to just cut back periodically. I mean learn that leaving food on your plate is not a bad thing and seconds is rarely wise. Forgiving one’s self for bad days when we indulge is another as well as learning that this is a life style choice, not a diet in reality. One more tip I have for you. I have two days a week I allow myself to eat a sweet treat. Could be a couple of reases cups or a bowl of ice cream, but I don't eat sweets every day. I also have one designated day every month that I allow myself to eat anything I want without chastising myself. It gives me things to look forward to so that I know I'm not missing out. I've found I enjoy my food more and these special times off the diet mean all the more. Food tastes much better to me than it use to. Give these things a try if you will. If nothing else start reading your labels. I'm sure if you notice the sodium content on foods you are in for a huge surprise.